Okay, so I was thinking about writing a short story for today’s post. The other week when I wrote this motorcycle story, I realized how much I missed writing short stories. I get so busy between work and planning and doing things for this blog that I don’t get a lot of time to just sit down and write these days, so I thought I’d start making time to do it and maybe write a short story a couple Saturdays a month. So that was the plan for today and I even had the story all set to write. I’m not going to tell too much about it, because I still plan on writing it later and the working title is, “The Summer Of Magic Mushrooms And A Free Twelve Pack.” Sounds intriguing, huh? Well, I hope it does, but it didn’t get written this week.
Here’s what happened.
Last night I was kind of tired but I planned on coming home from work and writing the story. When I write a short story it’s a three level process. First I write it straight off the top of my head, all lickety-split with no editing what-so-ever. Then I walk away from it and usually look at stuff on the walls of the MBIP World Headquarters with a CD playing to clear my head for about a half an hour. Then I go back to the story on my computer and start to polish it up. I tighten it up, try to shorten sentences and punch it up and add humor wherever I can. And then I walk away again and sometimes leave it alone for a day. Then I’ll go back for a third round and probably eliminate a lot of meandering things and really edit it and look for misspellings and tighten, tighten, tighten. Then that’s it, it’s ready and outside of typos I see later, I leave it alone and the story is done.
Well none of that happened last night.
All day yesterday my left nostril was sore. Then last night it was really hurting and it was kind of red and I started freaking out and wondering if I had some kind of weirdo nostril cancer or something. It was really sore and the pain and the thought of nostril cancer started making me very nervous. I even Googled “nostril cancer” and this came up and it freaked me right the fuck out!
So I decided to go to bed and just read books until I passed out and that’s what I did. I set my alarm for 5:30 in the morning and I was hoping the pain in my nostril would be gone and I’d write the short story in the morning and hopefully have it done and posted around noon today. Well, I woke up and the pain was gone and in it’s place was this:
A pimple! A motherfucking pimple on the side of my nose! Okay, I’m 58-years-old! This shit happened to me three years ago and i thought it was a fluke. Then about a year or so after that, i got another pimple on the end of my nose and it really looked freaky. I don’t have a post about that because my blog was on a break then. But still, I went through my teenage years battling pimples on my face and one thing I looked forward to about growing older was that at least that would be one painful part of life that I could shut the door on. But I guess this shit is never going to end! Motherfucker! Needless to say, I didn’t get the stupid fucking short story done. I’ve pretty much obsessed over staring at this thing all morning and wondering when it will be gone. But as I was obsessing over the pimple, time was ticking and I knew I’d have to put something up here today, so I decided to put up some pictures of Joan Jett that I have hanging in the MBIP World Headquarters.
I told you when I’m writing I like to wander around my apartment and look at things I’ve put on the walls, and I’ve got a lot of Joan Jett pictures and memorabilia hanging up here. I’m guessing that no one else in Peoria has this many pictures of Joan Jett on their walls. And so here it is:
The MBIP World Headquarters Collection: Joan Jett
Well, I hope you enjoyed that, I’m going to go and put a hot washcloth on this pimple. LIfe sure isn’t fair sometimes and if there is a god or whoever is in charge of this kind of stuff in our universe, well...thanks a lot for this...asshole! Ugh! We’ll see you all tomorrow.
