This week marks the opening week of Tanners Orchard and it’s their 70th anniversary. If you’ve never been to Tanners Orchard you may think it’s just about apples there, but you’re wrong. While apples are a big part of the place, it’s an orchard and all, there’s a lot more there than Adam and Eve fruit and if you keep scrolling down you’ll see what I mean.
It’s an easy drive to Tanners Orchard. You just head out on Knoxville Avenue towards Dunlap and it turns into Illinois 40 and it’s about a twenty minute drive. As soon as you seen the sign, pull in the lot and whoomp, here we are at Tanner’s Orchard!
The Market
The market is a large building that houses the apples and apple by-products and so much more. Let’s go inside and take a look.
As soon as you walk in there’s a Christmas tree to greet you. As you’ll see later, Christmas is year-round here at Tanners. There’s hats for sale that celebrate the 70th anniversary of Tanners Orchard this year. if you’re a cheapskate you can just get the Tanners magnet and call it a day.
This is a cool display here. It’s wooden kegs where you can try samples of Tanner’s famous apple cider.
“Nothin’s better ‘n apples.” Hmm...obviously this kid has never tried vodka or mescaline but let’s leave him be and head into the heart of the market!
There’s the apples and I have to admit, I was kind of shocked when I saw them. This is the entire amount of fresh apples in here! I found out later that the true apple season doesn’t start for a month or so and right now all they have are the golden apples. They look green to me, but hey, what do I know? There’s still plenty of other apple products in here and I love the fact that none of them have a keyboard attached to them. There’s a display of homemade apple butter over there.
There’s plenty more tasty apple products in this bakery case over here. Tanners apple cider donuts are one of the most popular items in here and there’s also apple muffins, apple strudel, apple fritters and a mini caramel apple nut pie! If you like apples and have a sweet tooth, they’ve got you covered here at Tanners.
Christmas
I told you at the top of the post that it’s always Christmas in here and here’s the proof! Look at all of these Christmas items they have in stock and it’s just August! Can you imagine what it’s like in December? Wait a second, it’s just August, I don’t even want to think about December yet, so let’s just keep moving along!
Dining Rooms
They have an in-house bakery and kitchen in here and lunch is served from 11AM to 2PM every day. They have sandwiches and soup and all of the above bakery items we just saw are available as well as many others. There's two large dining rooms here to enjoy your meal in. I didn’t eat today, but you can see my dining experience I had a couple years ago in this post.
Elizabeth
I purchased something from the market and Elizabeth not only rang me up, she posed for the MBIP Camera looking very cute! So what did I purchase? Well, keep on scrolling and you’ll find out!
The Back 40
Either this is new or I didn’t see it the last time I was here. It’s an amusement area called, “The Back 40.” Here’s another pretty girl behind the booth but I can’t remember her name! I really need to start writing this stuff down, but thanks for posing for the photo!
There’s all kinds of interesting things back here and kids can climb all over them. Everything from a tire and tractor sand box to a ship to a fire engine to a wooden train to a grounded airplane.
This is a hay maze that people can walk on. I found this to be a rather odd attraction and it also gave me a Garry Shandling Show/Hank Kingsley flashback.
Mutant Attention Whore Animals
They also have animals back here and at first these chickens and roosters were pissing me off because none of them would stand still and pose for the MBIP Camera. It took me about 53 shots to get that last shot of the chicken and the rooster and then those two assholes are looking down at the ground and not at the camera.
Well, I quickly abandoned the asshole chicken and roosters and walked over to this area.
Now this is more like it! This guy was more than happy to look right at the MBIP camera and stay still while I took the photo! If only I knew what kind of animal this is, this would be perfect!
Wow, check out this guy! He not only posed for the camera he stuck his head right through the fence to have his picture taken! I found out later that this is a new strain of animals they’re developing out here to fit in more with our new social media culture. What they’ve done is breed dachshunds and goats and in the breeding process, genetic scientists have fused in DNA and molecular structures from the Kardashian sisters and Caitlyn Jenner to create this new breed of an attention whore animal that loves to be photographed! I didn’t think I’d get a science lesson coming out here, but oh the things you learn while blogging!
They’ve even installed a runway for these attention whore animals to pose on and this guy strutted up and struck a pose. He’s too sexy for his...ears?
My Purchase
I was a cheapskate, I got the Tanner’s magnet and now I’m calling it a day. We’ll see you all tomorrow!
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740 IL-40
Speer, Illinois
309-493-5442
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facecrack page Related Posts: A Is For Apple—A Trip To Tanners Orchard and The 2016 MBIP Halloween Mascot Decision: Donald Trumpkin Or Rupert Pumpkin...You Make The Call!
Apple Scruffs, Apple Scruffs, how I love you, how I love you...
Surprise link, click on It...I dare you!
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Bonus Item: Midwest River Cities Blog
I just discovered a new blog called, “Midwest River Cities Blog,” which is a husband and wife travel-blog devoted to Midwest River Cities. It’s a fun blog and they recently came to Peoria and hit 25 locations in one day! They went to some places that they found on MBIP and they gave this blog and myself a nice thank you and shoutout at the end of it. You can see the whole post by clicking here! Thanks for the shoutout and hope to see you two on your next trip!